So I saw that article and I thought I needed that. I got my first business coach, who was David Wood, who at that time was in Sydney and I was in Melbourne. So I’d never met the guy; I just liked what his website said. I thought I’d give that a go. He turned out to be a fantastic coach. So a big shout-out to him. He’s an amazing coach.
Basically what happened in the first few sessions was I was just really disorganized and overworked and a bit exhausted at the time. I remember him pushing me and challenging me to finish this particular proposal to a university to create for them their first online course in graphic design.
I was doing a lot of work helping universities get face-to-face programs and turn them into online programs. I’d just been sitting on this—you know what it’s like. You’re just so busy and there are so many other things to do, but with that coaching I pulled it together. I put the application in and within two weeks I’d received word that I’d won that proposal.
At that time that was a $30,000 job. It was 15 years ago so it was quite a lot of money and completely paid for my coaching for the rest of the year, basically. So I think that’s a really obvious, not rocket science, reason to have a coach. Life gets so busy—perhaps I’m talking personally. It’s definitely something I get out of coaching and I get out of my coaches.
My life just gets so busy with two kids, a fulltime business, and lots of great friends. I do lots of stuff. I love to travel. So it’s really busy and sometimes I find it hard to stay focused on the things that are important. What happens instead is that it’s just the things that are in front of my face that get done. Or the people that are the loudest or bug me the most. I end up doing that, not the thing that will bring the return.
A good coach will be able to help you look at everything you’re doing and figure out which of those things is going to bring you the most return.
Andrea: There are lots of reasons to get a coach. As a coachee, the list is limitless. We want to hear from you as to what you think the top reasons are to get a coach. You can save money; you can save time; you can increase your health. All of those things I’ve experienced with a great coach.
It might not be amiss to mention that it’s okay, too, to just try a coach and have it not work out and change coaches. It’s not against the law. There’s not some coaching law out there that says once you’ve hired a coach that’s it and you’re forever and ever, amen. No one’s getting married, right?
So I find that especially for those listeners for whom it’s not their first rodeo and they’ve had coaches before, sometimes it can feel more difficult to get a coach as you become more experienced in your career. It might feel like people who are qualified or have the vantage point that you are looking for as you get more experienced gets harder to find.
I hear that quite often, actually. People say, “I feel like I’m at the top of my game and I don’t know who could help me.” It’s okay to try them on. It’s okay to try a coach from a totally different vantage point.
I also find it useful for me to find a coach for specific segments of my life. I might have a business coach but I’m also looking for a nutrition coach or a relationship coach or a spirituality coach. I try them out so that I’m not creating this really, really proficiency in my life in one area and neglecting the others.
Robyn: We had a trainer that used to work on faculty with us, Karen Cappello. She always used to make me laugh. She had five coaches at any given time, like a health coach for health, a business coach to help run her business, a career coach to plan what was next, a finance coach.
It might be that you have different coaches at different stages in your life. I’ve found that sometimes I really want more of a life balance, spiritual coach. Then there’s other times when I’m just going down the hard-nosed, executive, business coach path.
Andrea: Yeah, I think people often have a stereotypical idea that you have one coach at a time. That coach is supposed to take care of all of you. It looks exactly like one coaching session a week, etc.
But more and more, as coaches become proficient, it’s definitely the case that you can request—much like a bride these days. You don’t just go buy a wedding dress off a rack. You can go get any kind of custom-made dress and look like Lady Gaga if you want. You can request a coaching arrangement be custom-fit to you. It’s really fun that way.
Robyn: Of all the coaches you’ve had—and I’ve had quite a few—think about the best coach you had. What were the qualities or what was the thing that you got from that coach that made that coach the best coach?
Andrea: You know, I think the #1 characteristic of that coach was ego-less. So it was never about them. I think that has become more and more rare, unfortunately. The coach all of a sudden has an agenda or the agenda can be as simple as an attachment to the fact that I do really well so they can brag about me. That happens quite a bit, I’ve noticed.
Robyn: What a problem to have. You’re doing so well that all your coaches are bragging about you.
Andrea: Well, I guess that sounds really egotistical but it can really be dampening because you just know that the reason they’re coaching you in a certain direction is because they want to show you off in a certain way. Honestly, it’s terrible.
Robyn: Oh, that’s not good.
Andrea: It’s a very narcissistic coach when that’s happening. How about you?
Robyn: When I think of the best coach I ever had, I don’t know if I should be naming names but I will because she’s such a fantastic coach. Barb McEwen, Executive Coach, from Canada. Do you know her at all?
Andrea: No, I don’t.
Robyn: What was really great about that coaching, and it was such amazing coaching, is that first of all it was a fit. We’ve mentioned this before that not every coach is the right coach for you. Just because it’s great for me, it might not work for someone else. For me it was a great fit so therefore we coached for a while. What came out of that was that she got to know me a lot. I’m talking 18 months to 2 years.
What I really found valuable was the observations she would share. I always told my coaches, “I’m completely up for being challenged. I want to grow. If you hear me saying I love apples and want to eat apples and yet I spend all my days buying oranges, I want you to ask me why I’m buying so many oranges. I want that sort of intervention and challenging.”
So that was probably one of the most valuable things that she did. Perhaps because she knew me and also her experience, she’s an executive coach and she’s coached lots of women at the top of their game and heading up companies and things like that. She was able to share observations.
Sometimes I would go, “No. That’s interesting but it doesn’t do anything for me.” Sometimes she would share an observation and it would be one of those “aha” moments. I would find myself sitting on for the next week or two. Some of those really did contribute to massive life changes, which is quite amazing.
Andrea: It sounds like you’ve had some really great experiences. It makes me very happy.
Robyn: So that’s in terms of being clients for why you should get a coach.
Now, speaking as a coach, if you had a roomful of people, what would you say to them as to why they should get a coach?
Why You Should Get a Coach from a Coach’s Perspective
Andrea: I think truthfully, Robyn, I would not have a blanket recommendation that everyone should get a coach right now. It’s like what would you say to everyone about their health right now? I guess you could say, “Drink water.” That’s pretty universal. “Eat less sugar.” That’s pretty universal, too.
From a coaching perspective, I believe that a little coaching approach in every person’s life is not going to do any harm. There are a lot of coaching books written by coaches on every topic under the sun. So from the perspective of getting help in any of the areas that might be bugging you or you’re tolerating or you’re upset or angry about, definitely inasmuch as you can get coaching from a book I would prescribe that like I would prescribe a drink of water to anyone.
If there are people who are looking actively for a coach, what I would definitely say is to look for an opportunity to get to know that person with as much intimacy as possible. By that I mean different coaches have different ways to allow you to get to know them.
One of them might lead a workshop and you could attend and be in the same room with them. Somebody else might have a series of audios that they do. They might be free or you might invest in it and get to know them that way. You can get to know them through other clients of theirs through third-party conversations. Read what they write.
It used to be that we’d say to have a conversation one-on-one with that person, which can still happen and is still a valid way of assessing a coach but that’s one conversation.
I’m not a big fan of recommending people make a decision like hiring a coach based on one single conversation and nothing else, especially in this day and age when everyone should have at least a little bit of a digital footprint. More than one point of data, more than one conversation is warranted when you’re going to get as intimate as you are with a coach.
Robyn: That’s just a further reason why coaches need to be publishing what they do and putting stuff out there as much as they can so people can get to know them.
If I was speaking to a roomful of people, if those people were coaches, then I’d be telling them they all need to get a coach, don’t you reckon?