Research Paper: Mars And Venus – Coaching Perspective

2012/06/06

Respondents choice of coach

Male – 26%
Female – 74%

Most of the coaches had been clients with at least one coach. Reflecting the fact that the coaching profession is very nascent in India was the fact that some of them had never been coached.

Experience as sponsors

Male – 11%

Female – 89%

This trend is reflective of the overall distribution of coaches hired in the other segments, namely respondents hired as coaches and sponsored coaches. The criteria used by the respondents when they were sponsors, are similar to the ones they reckoned was used by their clients.

Some of them are:

The majority of respondents felt that both coaching styles of the coaches and the selection criteria used by the clients in coach selection were by and large gender neutral. We will revisit this after considering other relevant data.

5 out of 15 had hired coaches as sponsors and these coaches were also pre dominantly male. When given a choice to opt for coaches, the clients had in 50% of the cases discussed emotional issue when the coach was a woman. While the hiring maybe gender neutral, the coaching issue may be influenced by this factor.

Secondary Data and Interpretations

In sessions conducted by Steve Garrett and Jonamay Lambert which was focused on Gender difference in Coaching and being coached, The focus of the sessions was first gaining an understanding of gender differences, and then switched to how to use that understanding to help ourselves coach those of different genders. They found that specific gender differences in communication style include:

In our own face to face ICA classes in Bangalore, where there were live coaching sessions, there were 3 women who explored highly emotional subjects and of a very personal nature while only 1 man did that. Given that the ratio was 1 woman for every 4 men in the classroom, the percentages are even more stark.

In the an article in the May 2004 issue of Harvard Business Review by Katie Ludeman and Eddie Erlandson, entitled “Coaching the alpha male”, they say that in studying highly successful top male and female executives they find that women can be just as opinionated as Men and can cope with the stress equally well. However vast majority of the women tend to place more value on interpersonal relationships and pay closer attention to people’s feelings. The findings in the survey conducted also echo these sentiments to some degree.

There were some important points which surfaced in our survey as well.

More women clients focussed on issues of interpersonal relations like not being listened to and more men focused on effectiveness and performance related issues.
The executive coaching is heavily male dominated and the criteria for selecting the coaches are very similar to the one they would have for “Mentors” viz past experience in similar function, domain expertise etc.
While credentialing is getting currency, right now local bodies like Coaching Federation of India are far more well known amongst clients and the coaches certified by them are also predominantly male.

Perhaps, amongst the all-religious symbolisms in Hindu religion, ‘Ardhanarishvara’ is the most ingeniously outstanding creation. The meaning is: ‘Ardhanarishvara’ = Half + ‘Naree’ = Woman + ‘Eshwar’ = God. That is, the God who has half ‘feminine form’ and half ‘male form’! The latest findings of specialists in neurology, about the human brain, come fascinatingly close to this concept. The perceiving modality of human brain is having two distinct divides. The two hemispheres of human brain are reported to have two distinctly opposite ways of sensing and responding to the incoming sensations. The left cerebral half of human brain, functions through ‘Word’ dominated (Concepts and Logic) way, while the right cerebral half functions through ‘Direct Spatial perception’.

While the ‘Right Brain’ is naturally capable of creative perception involving insights and intuition, the ‘Left Brain’ is specialized in conceptual reasoning and verbal descriptions. For a balanced living both these capabilities are essential. Thus, though both halves of our brain differ in their quality, they perfectly complement each other to ensure a harmonious existence. The ‘Right’ and ‘Left’ cerebral hemispheres of human brain are perfectly synchronized by evolution, as portrayed by the ancient SEERS of India through ‘Ardhanarishvara’. In a human being, when the light of intuition fully complements the power of reasoning, he/she is said to have fulfilled the complete potentials of LIFE!

Conclusions

There is an overtly stated position that hiring of coaches by clients and sponsors is gender neutral.
There is also a tendency to say that hiring of coaches by clients and sponsors is gender neutral.
There is also a tendency to say that styles are also based on factors which are not gender related. This may be true in the executive and leadership coaching space even more than in life coaching.

There are subtle differences though. The perception is the stereotypical process Vs structure one.

In an early chapter of The Art of Choosing, Iyengar surveys the biology of choice. An innate drive, our penchant for choice reveals itself at an early age. In one experiment, a string was tied to the hands of infants; when tugged, it would make music play. Later, when researchers began playing the same music for the same amount of time but at random intervals, the infants became irritable. “These children didn’t only want to hear music,” Iyengar writes. “They craved the power to choose it.”

My Learnings

Credentialing will change the scenario
Criteria seems to be the same for mentors and coach selection
Even if selection is gender neutral, issue chosen has a tendency to be gender dependent e.g. Women for relational stuff and men for task oriented stuff?)

The ‘Right’ and ‘Left’ cerebral hemispheres of human brain are perfectly synchronized by evolution, as portrayed by the ancient SEERS of India through ‘Ardhanarishvara’. As coaches we need to understand this and become an androgynous coach.

Concluding Note

A lot more awareness of the critical difference between a coach and mentor has to be created in the market place. Exposure in the form of introductory sessions could be useful.

Coaching right now is being availed of by a very small population even amongst executives. Even there it is very limited to top executives. This is what has led to veer towards coaching young new entrants. Cost seems to be one of the factors and this can be overcome by group coaching. Group coaching is perhaps a more suitable option to make people experience and benefit from coaching.

One final clue to choosing the gender of your coach could come from Sheena Iyengar’s Twitter post, “ If you can’t decide between 2 options, flip a coin. See if you are happy or disappointed with what you got. That will give you your true answer.”

Further Research Areas

Do clients tend to pick up issues depending on the gender of the coach even if the hiring process did not have that as a criteria?

Are some of the nuances more cultural than gender based?

The research study has to be done on much larger population to validate the findings and get more nuanced interpretation

APPENDIX 1 Research questionnaire on effect of gender in coaching:

Gender of respondent: Years of work experience:

Years of experience as a coach:

Present occupation and responsibility:

Please give following details		Total	Sponsors	Male	Female
As Coach	No of clients
As Client	No of coaches
As Sponsor	No of coaches

1. Were there noticeable gender differences in the issues raised by your clients? If so, what were issues more specific to:

Male Clients:
Female clients:

2. Were there noticeable gender differences in the styles of your coaches? If so, can you please specify the styles you observed?:

Male Clients:
Female clients:

3. If you have you hired coaches for others and acted as sponsors, what criteria did you use to select the coach?

APPENDIX 2: Data Tables.

The results of the interviews are summarised below.:

No of respondents: 15

Males: 10

Female: 5

Average experience: 21

Average experience as a coach. -10

No of coaches Respondents had as clients
	Total	Male	Female
Total Male coaches : 42Total Female coaches : 15	6	5	1
	3	3	0
	4	3	1
	5	4	1
	10	7	3
	2	1	1
	2	2
	3	3
	5	2	3
	2	1	1
	11	7	4
	4	4	0

Coaches hired as sponsors

Total	Male	Female
35	31	4
5	5	0
1	1	0
15	12	3
1	0	1
3	3	0
10	10	0

Total	Male	Female
35	31	4
5	5	0
1	1	0
15	12	3
1	0	1
3	3	0
10	10	0

APPENDIX 3: Ardhanarishvara

Ardhanarishvara (अर्नारीश्वर, Ardhanārīśvara), is an androgynous deity composed of Shiva and his consort Shakthi, representing the synthesis of masculine and feminine energies. The Ardhanari form also illustrates how the female principle of God, Shakti, is inseparable from the male principle of God, Shiva. Ardhanari in iconography is depicted as half-male and half- female, split down the middle. The best sculptural depictions of Shiva as Ardhanari are to be seen in the sensuous Chola dynasty bronzes and the sculptures at Ellora and Elephanta.

`Ardhanarishvara` is a combination of three words `Ardha`, `Nari` and `Ishwara` means

`half`, `woman` and `lord` respectively, which when combined means the lord whose half is woman. It is believed that the God is Shiva and the woman part is his consort Parvati or Shakti. The Ardhanarishvara represents a constructive and generative power.

This is one of the very important forms of the god worshipped by Hindus. The reference of Ardhanarishvara is found in many Hindu scriptures. God is beyond the concept of any sex. So God can be male, female, and even neuter too. So God existing in this intrinsic condition is referred as Ardhanarishvara.

Philosophically this form is quite associated with the grace of God. Shiva and Shakti are one and the same supreme power. The formless god is called Parashiva. The god creates the world and act for the benefits of Pashus (souls), who are attached by Pasha (bondage). The power of creation comes from Shiva and Shakti. Though they are incorporated in the same form they act independently as well as jointly. This is understood when the philosophers in ancient scriptures

describe Shakti as wife, mother and daughter of Shiva. As wife, Shakti acts together with Shiva, as mother Shakti becomes Shiva or Shiva comes out of Shakti and as daughter Shiva becomes Shakti.

India from its ancient time has many sculptures and paintings of Ardhanarishvara, which are found in various poses, like `Abhanga`, a posture with only one curve, `Tribhanga`, a posture with mild three

curves and `Atibhanga`, a posture with extreme curves. Thus maleness and femaleness are contained in one frame in Ardhanarishvara.

Perhaps, amongst the all-religious symbolisms in Hindu religion, ‘Ardhanarishvara- eeshawar’ is the most ingeniously outstanding creation. The meaning is: ‘Ardha’ = Half +

‘Naree’ = Woman + ‘Eshwar’ = God. That is, the God who has half ‘feminine form’ and half

‘male form’! The latest findings of specialists in neurology, about the human brain, come fascinatingly close to this concept. The perceiving modality of human brain is having two distinct divides. The two hemispheres of human brain are reported to have two distinctly opposite ways of sensing and responding to the incoming sensations. The left cerebral half of human brain, functions through ‘Word’ dominated (Concepts and Logic) way, while the right cerebral half functions through ‘Direct Spatial perception’. While the ‘Right Brain’ is naturally capable of creative perception involving insights and intuition, the ‘Left Brain’ is specialized in conceptual reasoning and verbal descriptions. For a balanced living both these capabilities are essential. Thus, though both halves of our brain differ in their quality, they perfectly complement each other to ensure a harmonious existence. The ‘Right’ and

‘Left’ cerebral hemispheres of human brain are perfectly synchronized by evolution, as portrayed by the ancient SEERS of India through ‘Ardhanarishvara’. In a human being, when the light of intuition fully complements the power of reasoning, he/she is said to have fulfilled the complete potentials of LIFE!

APPENDIX 4 References and Acknowledgments

References

Steve Garrett and Jonamay Lambert - http://www.careerperformancestrategies.com/pdf/genders.pdf

Sri Jitendra Swami’s explanation of Ardhanarishvara

The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, published by Bantam press

Sexing the Brain by Lesley Rogers, published by Phoenix

Coaching - Evoking excellence in others by James Flaherty published by Butterworth-Heineman

Executive coaching - Practice & Perspectives by Catherine Fitzgerald and Jennifer Garvey Berger, published by Davies-Black publishing

Coaching the alpha male - by Katie Ludeman and Eddie Erlandson published in The Harvard Business Review issue of May 2004.

The Art of Choosing by Sheena Iyengar, published by Hachette Book Group

http://nithyanandafamily/insight/ardhanarishvara---concept-and-significance

Acknowledgments:

Ram Ramanathan, director ICA in India for his constant support, motivation and presence in the ICA journey.

J. Kalyanaraman, EVP, Ad Astra Consultants for his help in articulating my thoughts and helping me in thinking in pictures

Bikramjit Maitra for helping me expand my horizon and giving me help in my literature scan. And my mentor coach encouraging me in my coaching profession

Nikhil Benegal for being my buddy coach for my ICA submissions

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