SINK – Good and Bad
The degree to which the subject is drained is the degree to which he/she needs to be replenished for balance to be maintained. A sink is a normal part of healthy living and is not necessarily a negative thing. However, it can have negative effect on a subject, if the source of the sink is unnecessary or unwarranted as in the case of a physical injury that drains blood, or an unhealthy fear or a demanding person that can drain a subject of emotional energy.
It is also true that in the absence of a sink, the subject can experience a state of stagnation which is not conducive to growth and can overtime lead to a state of ill health. Physically this is true when a person consumes food excessively with no means of expending the energy through physical exercise.
In an emotional sense receiving but not giving can lead to a state of selfishness or a self-centredness that is detrimental to emotional growth as emotional growth takes place through relationships, both by receiving and giving emotionally.
FLOW and Resistance
Any resistance in the channels either from the source to the subject or from the subject to the sink leads to a slowing down or a breakdown of FLOW, similar to how a clogged up artery affects flow.
Resistance can also be seen as a higher amount of energy needed at a Sink (activity, person), which the subject doesn’t possess. This could be the case with dealing with a difficult work colleague, spouse on a daily basis, or emotionally dependants, or even caring for a sick loved one over a prolonged period of time. Resistance to handling a situation, a task or a person is seen by the hesitation within the subject, or seen through emotions of fear, guilt, condemnation a sense of mental agony or bitterness.
Recognising the blockage to flow will require the need to remove the blockage (blasting cholesterol in an artery), or find an alternative route past the blockage (Bypass surgery). This may mean having to shift the perspective on an issue or change the energy of the emotion associated with that activity. For example fear, condemnation and guilt are negative energies. On the other hand the need to increase the level of flow from within the subject towards a particular activity or course of action will require a means of energising them to a higher level.
Personal Reflection
- What are your sources of healthy emotional flow?
- How often do you set aside time to get recharged? What is that process like?
- What drains you in an unhealthy manner?
- What precautions do you take to ensure that your emotional tank is not overdrawn?
F.L.O.W Coaching Application
The FLOW tool is a means of helping clients regain positive FLOW or engagement with life and activities and maintain a healthy balance.
Facilitating flow can be done using the acronym F.L.O.W
Facilitate – the goal of the process
Limiting- Identifying the limiting cause or blockage
Open/Options – the means of opening flow or options for redirecting flow
Will- Wilful action steps (How to increase FLOW in and limit Flow Out)
FLOW can be used as a coaching model itself where the 4 steps represent the 4 stages of the coaching process or as a tool within coaching to help shift a client’s energy from net low to high. This may be done in one of 4 ways
- Enhancing flow in at the source level- connecting to a source that energises
- Decrease energy loss or drain through harmful factors or causes
- Remove blockages and resistance
- Re-establish flow through a new route or enhance flow through a greater source of energy
The role of the coach may have to be that of the source initially, to enthuse and energise the client (International Coaching Academy Pty Ltd, 2010). However for long term effects the client needs to be encouraged to take initiative to find his/her source of emotional top up.
Tips for the Coach
Some questions associated in using this tool:
Identify how to energise the client to have more energy (self-energising, or an external source of energising)
Identify how to remove blockages to minimise the loss of energy and increase flow
Coaching Reflection
a) What do you do as a coach to ensure that your presence is empowering and not draining on the client?
b) How do you actively engage in energising the client to build up the energy level for the coaching process?
c) What precautions do you take to ensure that the client doesn’t become dependent on you as the source long term?
References
International Coaching Academy Pty Ltd. (2010, Feb 24). Energizing. Couse Notes CPCP- Level 5.
Melissa L. Knothe Tate, T. F. (2010). Engineering and Ecosystem: Taking Cues from Nature’s Paradigm to Build Tissue in the Lab and the Body. Fileds Institute Communications, 1-19.