Valuing means looking at others in positive ways that benefit both of you.
Self-application
Be curious, not judgmental.
Walt Whitman
We’ve all heard the saying “Birds of a feather flock together.” People with similar interests or shared characteristics group together. It’s human nature to surround yourself with people who value you and what you stand for. Doing so gives us a sense of belonging—another uniquely human trait. But as much as we seek to belong, we ought to be equally open to appreciate the differences in others who seem to “belong” to other groups.
By becoming more self-aware and accepting that within us, we may become more accepting of that without us. By looking inward as we look outward, we can come to know thyself and others better. We can achieve this by self-reflection.
Self-reflection
Coaching application
One of the core competencies of coaching is establishing trust and intimacy with the client; creating a safe environment while helping an individual examine or re-examine underlying beliefs or issues that may detrimentally inform that individual’s life and the consequent possibilities or limitations. We do this by demonstrating respect for the client’s perception, learning style, and being. When working with a client, we must be very careful and always aware of our past experiences, core values, and our own potential judgments. When we focus more on valuing and appreciating, we focus more on enjoying the other person. Coaching is a process that applies tools and techniques to help others, and be a champion for new behaviors and actions by being fully present and listening. Thus, suspending judgment is critical in the coaching relationship, and an excellent way to coach by example.
Coaching Reflection
The coach may ask herself many of the same questions asked of the client in addition to: