A Coaching Model created by Joanna Denise Ycasiano-Dejos
(Authentic Life Coaching, PHILIPPINES)
Have you ever wanted to do something, but put it off –
when I finish school…, after I get promoted…, I’ll stick this out for now and give myself another two years…, when my children are a bit older…
I call that – Life on PAUSE. We are frozen in that moment in time, waiting for something to move us into action – whether it be a person, a situation, or an experience. Many of us go through life in this paused state for many, many years, never realizing that we are not truly living, not truly taking control of our lives.
My coaching model supports people into doing just the opposite – into living LIFE ON PLAY. When we live life on play, we take our fingers off the “pause” button and begin to actually take action, we begin to take charge of our destiny. At the same time, when we begin to live in this manner, life does become like play – happy, fun, fulfilling. We become like young children – more carefree, at peace, in the moment.
To live life on PLAY is to focus on:
P – The Person; Passionate Purpose
The main questions asked here are WHO AM I? WHAT AM I MADE OF? During this stage of the process of Life on PLAY, we dive deep and discover what your VALUES are, what your PURPOSE is, what makes you PASSIONATE and HAPPY, what are your STRENGTHS and correspondingly, what are your WEAKNESSES. These are the things, that ground you, that serve as your roots within a world that is ever changing and can leave a person confused and forever drifting.
L – Life to be lived
After discovering who you are and what centers you, the next question focuses on WHO DO I WANT TO BE? WHERE DO I WANT TO TAKE THIS LIFE? You now begin to listen to the story that is still to be told – what are your dreams? What is the vision you have for your life? What do you want to be able to achieve? What legacy do you want to leave behind?
A – Action, Accountability, and an ever-present Authentic Awareness
As your core is solidified and the vision is crafted, it is now time to bring in a dose of reality. The question here is: WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO GET THERE? Action plans are the main discussion point at this stage. These action plans give you the power of accountability – having firm timelines and being able to truly measure yourself versus what you want out of life. When put together, these action plans (whether big or small) will serve as a path from who you are now to who you want to be and where you want to go.
Throughout the process, an authentic awareness is called for – being able to look into one’s self and see the truth, to question and to gain insight, to be honest and faithful to who you truly are.
Y – Yearn for the authentic “You”
To yearn is to be filled with an intense desire for something; to yearn for YOU is to never tire of wanting to evolve and grow into the Authentic You. As you go through the process, it is important to realize that this process is not a one-stop deal nor is it linear. It is ongoing, moving from one area to another. It is indeed life on PLAY – it is continuous and flowing, as the swirls seen in the model. Therefore, there must be a conscious effort to take in the various experiences you will go through, revisit how these impact your core (WHO AM I?), and recalibrate your vision if need be.
You will realize that the authentic You is not stagnant. You will grow and develop much like a tree moves in the wind and changes color with the seasons. But there will be a part of you that will remain the same, solid and constant. That is your core, your center. These are the roots that will anchor you as the world changes around you.
Your vision and dreams are much like a hot air balloon tied to your tree – it may change course up in the sky, but it will be tethered and grounded by your roots – your values and your purpose. These will guide you in making decisions on which wind you will allow to sway your balloon.
Lastly, you will notice that the boundaries of “The Land of Authenticity” are clear, but not solid and set. Underlying again the importance of constant introspection – HOW DO MY EXPERIENCES (WITH PEOPLE, PLACES, SITUATIONS, ETC) IMPACT WHO I AM? Flowing from that, HAVE THESE EXPERIENCES SO DEEPLY AFFECTED ME THAT I AM NOW CHANGED? HOW NOW DO I DEFINE WHAT IS AUTHENTIC TO ME, WHAT IS IN ALIGNMENT WITH MY CORE?
To live on pause, to live outside the land of authenticity is to live in misalignment. Every time we settle and allow ourselves to remain in a state that does not flow from our center – we do a disservice to ourselves. How incredibly beautiful and joyful life would be if we lived within the Authentic Realm!