A Coaching Model Created by Fabio Salvadori
(Innovation Coach, ITALY)
A Coaching Model to Set Your Extraordinariness Free
My Coaching Identity
I believe that we are all extraordinary beings, but too often we yield to live an ordinary life. My purpose as a coach is to partner with my clients in their journey to liberate their potential so that they can be the extraordinary innovators they are meant to be.
My Clients
The shell of a lobster is hard and inelastic, and it doesn’t grow over time. So, while the lobsters keep growing during their life, their shell become smaller and smaller until it gets painful and they have only one option to continue their growth. To shed the old shell and create a new one. [ source ]
My clients are individuals or organisations that sense that there is something more, but they feel stuck in what they perceive as ordinariness. This awareness can be stressful but, as we can learn from the lobster’s story, it is also a sign that our extraordinary-self wants to expand.
Somes may resign to get comfortable in their claustrophobic ordinariness. But the ones who want to thrive will seek ways to get rid of the limiting structures that don’t serve them anymore and grow. Those are my clients. The ones seeking new and innovative ways to respond to the challenges of this small and hyper-connected world changing at ludicrous speed.
The typical questions they ask themselves are:
- How can I make an impact in my environment (family, organisation, society, the world)?
- How can I remain relevant in this changing world?
- How can I give the best to me and to the people around me?
- What can I do to create a life worth living?
- What legacy am I going to leave?
- What do I have to do to regain control of my life?
My Coaching Model
The inspiration for this model came from one of history’s most famous masterpieces; the Michelangelo’s David in Florence. Michelangelo carved the David from a piece of marble that had been waiting for 40 years, twice discarded by other sculptors. He saw something extraordinary within that block of marble, so he chipped away all the unnecessary material to reveal the remarkable statue we can now admire.
F Find your direction
Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.— Napoleon Hill
Find the way, find the why
It all starts with having a goal. To achieve a meaningful transformation we need a destination to focus upon. According to a phenomenon called “ target fixation ”, our body goes in the direction we are looking at. So, we must start from pointing our gaze in the direction we want to go.
Deciding where we really want to go is crucial to the success of the journey. We don’t need to know how to get there, but having a goal and keep it in sight is essential for a successful journey. If our gaze is not fixed on the goal, it will be easier to divert from our path and miss it. This phase is all about finding awareness and clarity about the destination.
- Find your goal: What do you want to achieve? Where do you want to go? To move you need a direction, a way. It doesn’t have to be perfect or final, but it’s vital to find your.
- Make it real: To transform a dream or desire into a goal, you must make it real. It must have form and substance. You must know when you want it and how you will know you reach it.
- Make it personal: there will be pitfalls and obstacles on your way to the goal, events outside your control. To push through them, you must fall in love, not only with the goal but with the journey. You need to find the “why” for your way. Shifting the perspective from what you want to who you need to be to get what you want. Make the goal, your goal.
The model in action
In the first stage is essential to clearly establish the Coaching Agreement, to listen actively and through powerful questions, to help the clients in getting clarity about their goal.
In this stage, I may use tools like the wheel of life, visualisation or the Johari window to co-create more awareness about what the client wants to achieve and who she wants to become. I can also use a “ complete the sentence ” exercise to deepen the connection with the goal, like “ If I get …, I will … ”.
Example questions
- What do you want to achieve?
- How do you feel when you think about your goal?
- Imagine yourself having achieved this goal; how will you feel?
- What will you be able to do that you could not do before?
- What is within your competence and control?
- Who do you have to become to get what you want?
- How will you know that you will have succeeded?
- What will you get if you get your goal?
R Remove the obstacles
Awareness precedes choice and choice precedes results. — Robin Sharma
The power of vulnerability
Each journey starts somewhere. Knowing where we are is as important as knowing where we want to go. Without knowing the starting place, we won’t be able to define the direction or to design a map and make the first step.
We must be aware of the structures and beliefs that are holding us back. But we also need to discover our strengths, the resources that we have and the ones we will need to acquire.
Like the lobsters, sometimes we need to become vulnerable if we want to grow. Removing the structures that don’t serve us anymore can be scary. For this reason, we need a space of trust, where we can let go of the old structure, release the power of our vulnerability, and expose our extraordinary self.
- Clear the view: What stops you from seeing the goal clearly? What assumptions and beliefs create a fog before your eyes? What are all those distractions trying to derail your gaze from the goal? Let’s get rid of everything that can get in the way of your journey so you can keep your goal always in sight.
- Break the cage: In your life, you’ve built structures. They are the ideas, thoughts, and assumptions that you perceive as truths. Your beliefs define your mental model, and they help you to relate with the world. They also determine how you perceive reality and in doing so, they narrow the range of possibilities that you can see. Let’s do a check on your structures to see which ones serve you and which ones are limiting you. Let’s remove the chains that are holding you back so you can connect with your true potential.
The model in action
Presence and active listening are essential to establish trust and intimacy with the clients so that they can feel safe in getting rid of old structures and step into the vulnerability that precedes their growth.
In this phase, I may use tools as the StrengthFinder or others to explores their life values. I may ask the clients to do some simple tracking exercises to monitor their habits and gain awareness about the existing structures.
Questions
- How many times have you tried to reach this goal?
- What happened to prevent you from reaching it?
- How do you treat yourself when you hit setbacks?
- What are your feelings about your current situation?
- What is blocking you from achieving your goal?
- What needs to change in your environment so that you can achieve your goal?
- What skills and abilities do you need to achieve your goal?
- What skills and capabilities do you have that will help you in achieving your goal?
E Explore the Possible
In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable. — Dwight D. Eisenhower
Make space for creativity
With this new awareness, we can plan and design the journey to the goal. It’s time to be creative, to see what is possible and to plan our actions. Using the resources discovered during the previous phase and without the structures that were narrowing our visual, we can explore new possibilities, plan new actions and design new structures to sustain us in the journey ahead. With the lightness inherited from the previous phases, we can unleash our kidful and playful self.
While a toddler’s world might be geographically tiny, it is mentally limitless; conversely, when we grow up, we have the potential freedom to explore everything around us, but will often limit ourselves to the same narrow range of places, people and experiences. — Paul Lindley
- Think like a toddler: What would you do if everything was possible? How far can you go without boundaries? Everything is possible for your extraordinary self, how can you use your potential to get where you want and to become who you want? Get comfortable with the unknown and make it your ally, it’s an opportunity to explore.
- Pack your backpack: Before starting any journey, you must carefully fill your backpack with all the resources and tools that you will need to support you. What new structures do you need to create? What and who will sustain you if things get rough? What is the best way to trace your journey, so you know you are moving in the right direction? What can you set up before the departure so you can get the best out of the journey ahead?
The model in action
My role as a coach is to create and hold the space for the client to be creative, to challenge his limits and beliefs and find new connections.
Through my presence, active listening and appreciative inquiry, I provide the support they need to express their potential and design their unique way forward. Frameworks like feed-forward and visualisation can help the clients in planning their next steps and in developing the structures they need to support them on the journey. Mindfulness can help the clients connect with their intuition.
Example questions
- How can you use this new awareness to reach your goal?
- What is the simplest solution?
- If you had no limitations how would you handle this?
- What would you do if everything was possible?
- Have you ever succeed in something similar in the past? What did you do then?
- What would really motivate you
- What would a change of attitude create for you?
- What would you do if you were …?
E Experience the Extraordinary
Extraordinary: going beyond what is usual, regular, or customary
Grow into your goal
Knowing what to do is not the same thing as doing what we know. There is a gap between understanding and doing; if we don’t mind to that gap, the whole process may crumble in it. Our extraordinary potential allows us to go beyond what was once usual and customary to create the change we want. But this new extraordinary-self needs the structures, the space and the time to grow and expand to reach its full potential.
The model in action
My role as the coach is to create and hold the space for the client to be creative, to challenge his limits and beliefs and find new connections.
Through my presence, active listening and appreciative inquiry, I provide the support they need to express their potential and design their unique way forward. Frameworks like feed-forward and visualisation can help the clients in planning their next steps and in developing the structures they need to support them on the journey. Mindfulness can help the clients connect with their intuition.
Example questions
- How is it going? What is working and what is it not?
- How do you feel looking at what you’ve achieved so far?
- How do you feel looking at your plan now?
- Are your new structures supporting you? How can you improve?
- How is your actual journey compared to your plan/expectations?
- What have you learned about yourself?
- How can you use this new awareness in other areas of your life?
With chiseled touch The stone unhewn and cold Becomes a living mould, The more the marble wastes, The more the statue grows. Michelangelo
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