A Coaching Model Created by Clare Ng
(Transformational Coach, UNITED STATES)
So you’re sober, now what?
Three years ago, something happened in my life that I truly never thought possible. My dad went to an Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meeting. I was twenty two years old at the time, and before then the majority of my life was left a blur as to whether or not my dad was sober. I had studied addiction in college and attended a couple AA and ALANON meetings myself, and was convinced that if my dad would just attend one meeting, it would change his life. So here we were, it happened. He attended a meeting. And we watched one month of sobriety turn into a year, and a year turn into two and then three. We slowly began to breathe easier, began to trust again. But what he and we quickly realized was now as this new sober self, we didn’t really know each other. All of these years we spent connecting, I was connecting with a person who was not himself most of the time. There was a lot about him that I didn’t know, and a lot about himself that he didn’t know either. It became very apparent that the big hurdle of becoming sober had been made, but the even bigger hurdle of “now what” was looming ahead.
I believe that many people approaching the idea of sobriety or just overcoming the hurdle have this same lurking worry. Once I become sober, who am I? It can leave the addict drowning in a world of questions unsure if they can handle this new life in sobriety. I believe this is where coaching is the answer. Through coaching, recovering addicts can find the support they need to stay on the path of sobriety. Learning to be self-aware, uncover their values and purpose in life, and continue in action towards the better life they’ve chosen for themselves.
My recovery coaching model is a recipe for positive growth. Each part of the process will help bring you towards your dreams and a more fulfilled life. I believe in you and in your potential. Through the coaching process, I will help you bring clarity and commitment to your life. I will support you in turning your beliefs of “I can’t” into “it’s possible” and turning those possibilities into action. It’s easy to push your dreams aside and let excuses rule your lives, but in realizing you are truly the only thing that can stand in the way of your dreams, true transformation can take place. I will be here as your partner to explore new opportunities and perspectives while you commit to a plan of action to move yourself in the direction of positive growth and transformation.
We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are –Max Depree
RECIPE for Positive Growth
It’s not about fixing what is broken, its nurturing what is best within ourselves. –Martin Seligman
Using the RECIPE in Coaching
Recognize: the current situation and opportunities
The first part of the coaching process involves exploring the current situation. What are you doing now? How is it working? What would you be open to changing? Where are the opportunities? By taking an open and honest look at where you are now, you will open the door for your positive growth and transformation.
Envision: the ideal life, career or outcome
Once you have an awareness of where you are now. You can picture how you want it to be. Really envision it. If no obstacles or challenges stood in the way, what would your life be like? How are you feeling? What are you wearing? What is around you? Who are you with? By creating this real picture in your mind of your goals and ideal life, you will start to create a shift from imagination to true possibility.
Commit: to action and goals
With that ideal life in mind, you can create plans of action to move closer to your goals. How can you make it happen? What steps to you need to take? What are you willing to commit to? What can you do today? This week? This month? To make your dreams a reality, and how can I support you?
Invite: positive energy, support, and self-love
Your journey of growth and transformation won’t be easy. So as you create these visions, goals and actions, it will be increasingly important to invite positive energy into your life. Invite support. Just because this is your journey doesn’t mean you have to go at it alone. Who in your life can support you? What exercises can you practice to keep yourself motivated? And even more important than outside support will be the love you have for yourself. This growth can only thrive as you continue to love and support yourself in a life of happiness.
Plan: for push back, detours and new obstacles
To aid you in supporting positive energy, plan for push back. What might happen this week that could stop you from action? What difficulty might you face reaching for your dreams? What has stopped you in the past? How can you approach it? What will you do to ensure nothing will stop you from accomplishing your goals? Your journey will not be a straight path to success, but if you prepare yourself for difficulty, the fear of failure and rejection will become less of an impact on your life.
Embrace: life, change, opportunity and success
Lastly, EMBRACE IT! Embrace life, change, opportunity and success. Celebrate wins- no matter how small they might seem. Celebrate push back because you have learned from it. Celebrate yourself and your journey because no matter what challenges you face, you have committed to giving yourself the life of happiness that you deserve.
Like wildflowers; you must allow yourself to grow in places people thought you never would-E.V.