Coaching Model: HEALS

Assess resources and act

1. Let their children lead them.
2. Let go of feeling they have to know all the answers and always be in charge.
3. Let their children show them how they want to connect.
4. Look up from  their own struggles to consider others who have gone through challenging times. By looking up, clients see that challenges are a part of life — and that resourcefulness is part of every human. Seeing this resourcefulness in others will inspire.
5. Look for lightness moment-to-moment through their senses: When do they feel physically or emotionally uplifted? Is it a sunny day? Is it when they hear children laughing? Is it the smell of coffee brewing in the morning? No source of lightness is too mundane.
6. Laugh.
7. Look for the ways their small actions tie to the long-view of their lives.

Sustain yourself

Self-sacrifice leads to resentment and burnout. Tender self-care leads to sustainability and lightness.

I invite clients to be aware of how they care for themselves. Are they OK with giving themselves good things like eight hours of sleep and a walk on a sunny day? Do they speak kindly to themselves, even when they fall short?

Do they seek out people and communities that uplift their spirits?

Can they view setbacks or a lack of progress with loving-kindness?

Do they celebrate their accomplishments?

Acknowledgments

This coaching model would not be possible without the contributions of many wise teachers. I wish to acknowledge Eckhart Tolle and the late Stephen R. Covey and Viktor Frankl for teaching millions how to hold a vision. I thank Carol Hendershot and April Hadley, my teachers at the Grand Rapids Center for Mindfulness. Last, I thank all of my instructors and fellow students at the International Coach Academy.

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